I have been off work for a while. A month in fact. Time goes by so much slower compared to when I worked. A month jobless feels like forever because I have so much more time. A month when I had a job felt like it would go by in a blink of the eye, very fast. I think when you have something to actually do, time goes fast. I began programming in the past few days, and time would actually fly by as fast as when I had a job. This is just how things work I guess. But do I miss a job? Heck no haha.
Ever since I have left elementary school, I have hated school. Everything I did felt like a order by someone to do something, it was too authoritarian for my taste. Everyday I was bounded by a desk and fed knowledge that I had to memorize to become “smart”. When tests came back around, I thought someone liked pouring red cherry Kool-Aid all over my papers for fun because of how many red “X’s” I got for incorrect answers. Then when the report cards came around I received lots of “E’s” for excellence, just kidding they were for failing the classes. Every year this process would happen over and over again, and no I am not justifying I did the right thing. However, this would make me feel stupider and stupider by the day and by the year. Math? My teacher thought I was the polar opposite of my brother who was smart, so that was another bonus. After graduating high school I became to realize that teachers aren’t as smart as we think they are. We give these people too much credit because they’re an adult figure and have a title called “teacher”. How smart and reliable can these teachers be if they do the same thing each and every year by following the curriculum they are forced to teach? How smart can someone that is not gaining any new knowledge be? The smart teachers are the ones that self teach themselves new knowledge every year. So, just because they have the “teacher” title, don’t ever think they have the right to tell you how smart you are. You are only as smart as you want to be. Grades are not only good for showing how good you did in a class but they’re also good for showing obedience in this authoritarian world. Let me know how you guys feel.
I use to be an antisocial person until I became a cashier. You could call me shy, quiet, disturbed (just kidding), and yes, I had all of those traits to some degree. I barely spoke in high school and people thought I was a mute. I literally talked to nobody except for like two people in school. Then one day when I applied for a job. Instead of getting the position of a production processor (producing clothes for the sales floor), I got the position of a cashier, how ironic. At first being a cashier was scary because I had to talk to all these random people and not screw up. Too many awkward situations at first, especially when I said “hi” and they don’t say anything back. Also when customers acted too nice and I start to feel really uncomfortable because I didn’t want to say something wrong but then I think who gives a crap, if they get butt hurt oh well. But over time I became use to everything and it became second nature. Being a cashier has thought me so many valuable things like, small talk (I hate small talk no offense, “how are you”, “good”), dealing with stupid people, and bettering my social interactions with the peeps, the bird peeps. I digress, it has improved my social skills which is priceless and made me get experience with the public. Even though I got paid peanuts for being a cashier, I gained very valuable skills that could be of use in the future. Sometimes in life things really do work out for the better even if you may not believe it.
Paralysis of Analysis – The state of over-thinking a situation so that a decision or action is never taken, in effect paralyzing the outcome. In other words having so many things to do that you do nothing at all. The human mind can only take so much. This is what happens to me when I have so many games and activities to do. I have about a hundred games on steam with about 5% of them completed. I bought many of them on the steam winter sale. I was like It’s cheap, so why not buy it? I also have tons of console games too (not bragging) collecting dust that will never seeing the light of day. I start to waste time on social media sites and do nothing productive at all. I wasted hundred of dollars for no value because I don’t have time to do the activity. I work 30-40 hours a week and time is of scarcity, I have to be cautious about what I do with it but I always seem to waste it. I think if I had some discipline I would be able to overcome it. I remember when I was broke and only had a few games and I enjoyed them all. Now I have so many games that I partially enjoy or so little before I move on to the next. It’s like tasting many food samples, but at the end of the day you’re still hungry. You want more but it’s not making you happy. You would think the more games you have or the more items you have the happier you’ll be. I was mistaken in that case. I don’t know which game to play, I don’t know which one deserves my time. Maybe if I was more minimalistic and buy one game at a time and if I complete that game I’m allowed to buy another. That way when the time is ready I can buy a new game with it maybe costing less because I’m not buying it on launch.
Some console games I have yet to finish: Xenoblade Chronicles X, Paper Mario Color Splash, Pokémon Sun and Moon, Mario Maker, Final Fantasy XV, Kirby Planet Robobot.
PC games I have yet to finish: Stardew Valley, Starbound, Mount and Warband, and so many others.
Things I have yet to learn completely: Java programming, C# programming
Let me know if you guys have experienced something similar.
(Digs in wallet or purse for 5 minutes holding up the line.)
Rinse and repeat over 100 times per day for minimum wage salary. The dialogue is basically the same with alternative phrases.
Being a cashier in retail can be tough. Especially when you got to put clothes and items away for customers to buy. You basically repeat the same lines over and over again like a robot all day. Managers tend to reinforce positivity even if you feel like crap. Smile more they say, you know what I cant be 100 percent positive all the time it’s called I’m not genetically inclined too. Sometimes when you forget to tell customers to have a good day, they look at you like your being rude. Look, I am at least allowed 1 day out of 365 to not say “have a good day”. Besides all that, 95% of customers tend to be cool and make your day go easy. I love when people actually talk to you about something not related to something they want. I tend to be extremely bored at work because there is virtually nothing fun to do, especially when I am the only one working the floor. Sometimes you get good coworkers to make your day go easy and sometimes the exact opposite that makes you want to stay home. This is only a little piece of what being a cashier is like.
Before I had a 9 to 5 job working 8 hours a day I was able to game a lot. I actually had time to game all day and get immersed. Nowadays every time I try to get into a game that’s long to complete it’s very hard. Open world games and story driven games can take me months and months to complete. I don’t even play Minecraft that much anymore because there are too many things to do in that game. And I don’t want to use all my time on one game because I want to enjoy other games. I usually go through a pattern of playing a game for a day then the next day I go to work. Only 2 days out of 7 that I am free. When I come back from work I’m too tired to play and that immersion gets delayed for the next day until it eventually fades away entirely. I never thought a job would take so much energy and time but that’s the reality. I have way too many games now but the only thing I end up completing at the end of the day is the work at my job. This is what working a 9 to 5 is like.